Back to normal, hopefully

Salam all, Alhamdulillah, things are pretty much going back to it was before. Schools are open, kiddos are resuming their golf classes, violin lessons and etc. Except that, I am, still, on WFH. The work arrangement has yet to be finalised, I'm anxiously waiting to be back in the office, back to to old routines. The new building has FINALLY completed, after like err.. 9 years maybe? Anyhow, I'm glad that I still got the chance inshaAllah to experience the new office and my new room! Oh my! After 15 years, I finally got my own room! Hehe. My newly bought coffee machine is ready to be at your service.

Post Pregnancy Update

Assalamualaikum. Syukran, alhamdulillah. I have safely delivered a baby boy weighted 2.6kg at 9.14am on 7th August 2013.

Take a breath, it's gonna be a long overdue update. Well, as a start lets rewind back to what actually happened before the delivery.

It all started on the 1st day of Ramadhan, how could I forget. Hubby was at offshore and I had my sahur and then took a nap before going to work. When I woke up for shower, I saw my pants was having red/brownish colour stain like a period. Ya Allah, I was so freaking nervous, as I am still 33 weeks. I didn't rush to hospital coz I thought probably need to wait first and see whether the bleeding stops, coz I googled and they mentioned that painless bleeding or spotting is normal for placenta previa. 

So I went to office, sent Naufal to school and every 30mins went to toilet and check whether got any spotting. I think after 3 hours then it started to bleed again. I drove myself to emergency and they monitor the CTG and thank Allah, it was ok and normal. But doctor decided that I need to be warded and under observation for one night and he gave me MC for 1 week. So I had to call my parents back up and they took the next available flight to KK. A bit difficult for hubby to come back as there was no boat available to shore.

Ok, here comes the 2nd bleeding series. A week later, when were having buka puasa at the hotel, I was bleeding like period. This time it was heavier than the 1st one. I didn't wanna inform hubby earlier coz I know it will spoil everybody's mood to eat. 

So I waited until we arrived home. As soon as we arrived home, I said to hubby that we need to pack my things and rush to the hospital. He was panicked when he saw the amount of blood and I was still bleeding when we were back home. And yes, I spent another night in the hospital. Syukur, baby is still healthy or else I might ended up in operation. I was only 34 weeks, still.

Well, the 3rd bleeding was the peak of all event. It was on 28th Ramadhan, 6th August. Non stop bleeding with some blood clot came out. Ok, it was scary! But I just had to finish my last nasi beriyani before going to hospital. Then we rushed to SMC and doctor came to check on me and he said he would prefer to do it the next morning but if the baby's condition not good that we might have to do it tonight.So, hold on baby, for at least 12hours. Hubby spent his night at the hospital too and we were anxiously waiting for sun to rise, praying hard that nothing serious will happen. We recited surah Maryam n Yassin all night long, hoping that Allah will ease everything for us.

The next morning, sharp at 8am I was pushed to the operation theatre. It was emotional for me, afraid that something could be wrong to the baby. At that point of time, mmg berserah n tawakal segalanya to Allah.

In the OT room, doctor had explained what could be the worst case happened to me and there is very unlikely that we would be able to get the stem cell blood of the baby. Doc said, he would save my life if there's any complication occurred and he also explained that my uterus may need to be removed, too in case of any bleeding.

Oh Allah, would you, want to hear that just a minute prior to the OT? So I started to selawat and recite my doa, I asked for forgiveness from hubby for all my wrongdoing all this while and then the operation started. It was so silence in the OT that you can hear the sound of pin dropped. 

But alhamdulillah, Allah the most merciful had ease the journey,  doctor keep on saying so far so good. Until doctor asked me - where's the baby's head during the last scan? Oh apekah?? He couldn't find the baby's head. Then in turned out that the baby somehow did somersault and his head turned upside down. You might be wondering why the doctor couldn't see the baby coz when the tummy was cut, the placenta is on top of the baby. So he had to korek underneath the placenta and soon I heard doctor said "Hi"! But I couldn't hear baby's crying! 

Alhamdulillah, few mins later doctor showed the baby to us and he was reddish, so tiny compared to Naufal and also so hairy. haha. Then hubby as usual azan the baby and that was the last thing i remembered. I was then unconscious and when I opened my eyes I was already out from the OT and pushed back to room.

So that was how it ended. Of course the pain just started until I don't even bother to hold the baby or breast feed. I just needed time for myself to overcome the trauma and pain and the midwife also said its ok, don't push yourself too hard, take your time to breasfeed.

The next day, baru lah start to breastfeed and it was the best feeling ever (with some tears came out coz it was painful when he first started to latch). Alhamdulillah, Allah grant us the easy path and no complication at all as what doctor had expected.

Tadaa!! Fresh from oven, Nafees 1st pics.

Ok, let's end it here. I promise to update more later. 

Bye! Xoxo

23 weeks

Salam.

I finally got myself an iPad mini, the iPad 1 is officially Naufal's now. Hehe.

Anyway, alhamdulillah, I'm on my 23 weeks of pregnancy. So far it has not been as smooth as during Naufal's pregnancy, too many things happen and I've also cried so many times. Seems a little bit sensitive this round and I thought I could be a baby girl but its gonna be a boy instead. ;)

Actually, something happened 2 days after we came back from UK. When Naufal woke me up to pee-pee around 5am, I felt something came up from the bottom. My panties was wet as well as my pants. So I was really panicked, but since husband was not around I tried to be calm. After a while the fluid stopped. I couldn't think of anyone that I wanted to seek for help and I waited until 7.00am, immediately sent Naufal to school and I drove straight to my gynae. Unfortunately, my doc was not around until 12 noon, so I was warded and they monitored the baby's heart beat. Then it was confirmed that the baby heart's still ok, so the mid wife asked me whether was it really the amniotic fluid? I said I'm not sure, but I remembered when I had Naufal, it was the water that came out first.

Doc arrived around 1pm so he asked few questions and did ultrasound and finally vagina examination (VE). Ultrasound was ok, he said it couldn't be the amniotic fluid coz everything seems fine, he suspected probably its a fungus infection. Ouchh. I have no idea!

So yes, it was confirmed a fungus or yeast infection. Uh! Alhamdulillah, so glad to hear that. So he gave some cream to put on the itchy area and also pills to be inserted and that is the most uncomfortable part! Hubby already rushed back home from offshore, coz he was so worried when I informed him.

That was why I said this pregnancy is a really tough one. During the early days, it was the brown spotting, then very bad fever n flu all the times, unmanageable stress at work and also about the house renovation in Seremban and recently the infection. So far I only gained 6 kilos! It's pretty cool coz during Naufal's time I already gained like 12-14 kilos at 22 weeks! But as long as the baby growth's is ok nothing much to worry la kan.

May Allah ease this journey, please pray for a safe pregnancy and delivery for me & the baby. Little man, stay strong, OK! Amin.

Big Ben, I'm coming!

Salam,

I'm writing this post while in the plane, going to London! It was super duper last minute, only 4 days (that was on Thursday) notice prior departure and I was freaking out coz my passport will expire within 6 months, which will not allow you to travel overseas.

So I took the morning flight to Seremban on Friday, coz it was a public holiday in Sabah and went straight to imigresen. Luckily my uncle worked there before and I was so lucky that my passport was ready within 1 hours without having to wait. Hehe, I felt sorry for those people who came before me.

Then, we were contemplating whether to bring Naufal along or not. Hubby & Naufal already planned going back KL on Thursday morning, which left me alone to do all the packing, including for Hubby. Coz Hubby went to USM for his lectures until Monday and we only met at airport hotel before flying to London on Tuesday morning. Fuhh, already sounds complicated kan!

Hence, we finally decided not to bring Naufal along. Furthermore, it was just a short trip and for work purposes and testing will be in Manchester, quite a hectic journey if Naufal's around. So Naufal stayed at Seremban with my parents and I think he enjoyed it coz Atuk always buy candies for him!!

So that's my pre-departure story and I am missing him so bad now. Really need to bring him for holidays later, so at least we don't feel guilty leaving him.

Ok gtg now, here comes another meal before we reach London. Btw, I'm gonna gain so much weight in UK coz these are the food that I craved for:

- Gregg's cheese & onion
- lots of walkers chips cheese & onion
- Thai sweet chillies chips
- nachos
- kebab @ Imran's Sheffield
- hot chocolate
- miller's yogurt
- strawberries
- fresh milk
- haloumi cheese
- pecan pastries
- bread

And the list goes on. Hehe.

Bye!

Back in the kitchen

Salam.

I didn't realize that I was so emotional in the previous post. Anyway, what past is past and there's NOTHING I could do to change it, but at least I have the guts to tell my boss how I felt. Haha.

So, anyways.. Hubby is now back onshore and I'm putting back my chef hat and I'll go back home as early as 4.30pm.

Hubby as usual requested for masak lomak cili api as the 1st dish at home. hehe. Tonight I've cooked daging, I couldn't recalled how much I put the cili padi but when we were having dinner Hubby was sweating, for the 1st time. Well, he asked for it, kasi pedas sikit, so I did put more than usual.

Sorry cayang, lets neutralized back by having fish soup tomorrow. hehe.

Well, this is the most satisfying job ever. :p

On the other hand, my check up with ObGynae is now bi-weekly. Alhamdulillah, I'm now on my 14 weeks, 2 days. Doc started to provide me with Obimin pluz & calcium. God knows how big the tablets are and I feel like throwing out few seconds after I swallowed them. I didnt take anything else other than what Doc had prescribed me. Even my mealshake or ESP.

So far the growth looks good and on track, alhamdulillah. Only Allah knows how I really feel during this pregnancy. After 2 miscarriages, I got a mixed feeling whether I will be able to make it until 40 weeks. Its a scary thing and traumatic for me, but insyaAllah, I know I'll be good in Allah's hand. Think positive and never has doubt in whatever Allah has plan for us.

Surah An'am: " He knows all that lies beyond the reach of human perception as well as all that is visible to man; He is the All-Wise, the All-Aware.."

May Allah ease this pregnancy journey! Amin.

Patah S3ribu

Assalamualaikum,

I miss blogging!

Anyway, I was heartbroken since last week coz my boss already informed us our performance rating. Too bad, no luck for me this year. But I so know I totally deserved it, instead of my colleague which the reason they used coz he was the acting manager for 3 month before we got the real manager.

So, since senior engineers are not many of us, the quota for getting rating 2 is less and they had to cut down. To be fair kononnya, each section only 1 of the senior can get the rating 2 and I was rated 3H (high) lah konon but you know they actually made that up. There is nothing special about getting 3H anyway.

I was in tears when I heard the news. The next day I only worked half day. I know I should be bersyukur but you know what, I never worked as hard as I have worked last year. The reason coz I wanted to reward myself since I have already lost 2 babies. I had too many projects to handle and bos pulak if anything he will ask me to do and any urgent over the weekends I was the one he called. Coz org sibuk cuti sgt la kan sampai dont care what happen. When I was somewhere in Labuan busy doing my project, Boss wanted me to fly to KL for a day trip just to present for 15mins. Lots more, sorry lah I had to bring this up, sounds like mengungkit but if you really dont know how to defend your anak buah based on performance, you are totally screw up.

After all the sacrifices and effort, it was all meaningless. What's the point of installing the 1st technology in Asia if the management don't even recognized it at the end of the day. I was so overloaded, I handled 5 contracts last year and it made my life miserable coz I had to stay in the office long hours and sometimes work during the weekend.

So this year, I'm not gonna be Boss's right-hand man lagi. No more dude. Go find somebody else but not me. This year I will keep it low, not going to work hard either.I'm so sick and tired in this kind of game. I'm gonna enjoy my pregnancyhood this year and only left with 6.5 months to work! yey. Freedom.

Anyway, I have said what I wanted to say to my boss. I told him the truth about my feelings. I'm sorry that I hurt his feelings but I just have to say it. I know, its probably the pregnancy hormon, but you are messing with a wrong lady engineer here. *grrrr*

Yes, rezeki comes in any means, but this time, I just couldn't take it. I have suffered so much from work and its totaly not worth it at all.

I'm only praying hard that Allah will give me strength and patience to work for another 6.5 months. I'm planning to ask doctor to give me MC. haha.

F O U R

Salam.

Apologize for the delay update, life has been hectic as a driver so far. Hehe.

Anyway, last Saturday was our 4th wedding anniversary. But so sad, Hubby's not around. Or else we could have been spending it somewhere cox we already bought a ticket back to KL from 30th Jan until 5th Feb. unfortunately he had exams and lectures at USM Penang and I myself is not allowed to travel until I'm 30 weeks. Sad.

Nevertheless, I had managed to plan it somewhere else. Well, KK is not bad as well so I booked us at a resort in Kundasang. It will be the best place for hubby to relax his mind and body after the hectic 3 weeks lectures and exams. The view is magnificent and it's gonna be cold as well. So ok lah kan, far from the busy town and Naufal also loves going to Kundasang.

So, here's to my super hubby, superdad and bestfriend, alhamdulilah for the great life for all those years and insyaAllah more to come. I love you and Naufal my manja boy so much.

Oklah, the rest should keep it secret. Hehe.

Pray for us. TQ!



@Helideck 2008 just married - 1st tempat dating..hehe


2009 - 8 months pregnant


2009 raya, after Naufal was born


2010 @ kundasang


Here's the latest 2012 Korea Trip.

Oh now I've realized that we don't have a picture together yet for this year. Gonna snap a lot later.

Bye!